Managing Stakeholders: Herding Cats, but With More Emails
By now, you’ve survived your initiation into the world of project deadlines (Chapter One) and mastered the fine art of running meetings without wanting to fake your own disappearance (Chapter Two).
But here comes the next level: stakeholders.
Yes, the mysterious group of people who all have opinions, all outrank you in some way, and all think their request is the most important thing since coffee.
Managing them is less like management and more like herding cats — except the cats send emails, call last-minute meetings, and sometimes sign your paycheck.
1. Everyone’s a Priority (But Not Really)
Every stakeholder thinks their request is urgent.
- Marketing needs updates by Friday.
- IT swears their change is “critical.”
- Finance just wants to know why you’re over budget already.
Your job is to smile, nod, and prioritize like a ninja.
Tip: Learn the phrase, “Let’s align on priorities.” It makes you sound diplomatic while secretly screaming inside.
2. Speak Their Language
Stakeholders come in flavors:
- Executives: Want one slide, big numbers, no details.
- Technical teams: Want every detail, preferably in binary.
- End users: Just want it to work and not break their routine.
You? You’re the translator again. Congrats.
3. Expect the Last-Minute Curveball
Even if you’ve nailed your plan, a stakeholder will swoop in with:
“Can we just add this one small thing?”
Spoiler: it’s never small.
Document it, mark it as a “change,” and practice your polite-but-firm “we’ll need more time/resources for that.”
4. Overcommunicate (But Not Annoyingly)
Stakeholders fear one thing above all: being left in the dark.
Weekly updates, quick recaps, or even a simple “here’s where we are” email can save you from panicked calls at 9 PM.
Golden rule: If they’re asking, “What’s going on with the project?” — you’ve already waited too long.
5. Pick Your Battles
Sometimes you have to fight for the project. Other times, you smile, let the stakeholder “win,” and quietly adjust in the background.
Project management isn’t just about schedules — it’s about diplomacy. Think UN peace talks, but with more spreadsheets.
Closing Thought
Managing stakeholders isn’t about controlling them (ha, good luck). It’s about guiding, informing, and occasionally bribing them with donuts to stay aligned.
This was Chapter Three of The Bible of the Volunteer-Told Project Manager.
Stay tuned for Chapter Four: “The Art of the Status Report: Making Updates Sound Way More Interesting Than They Are.”